For Small Group Leaders
We believe that the ideal group is from 4-13 people (There were 13 in Jesus’ Small Group).
There are three colors to the text. The words in blue are questions for the leader to ask the group. The text in a dark brown color is scripture itself. All scripture that is used is from the New International Version unless otherwise noted. The text in black is my own notes and commentary on the passage. I have sought for my notes to be of help to the leader/facilitator as the group interacts. Sometimes the notes will not be needed, especially if the group is full of seasoned Christians that are mature in their knowledge of the Scriptures. You may find that you use just the questions.
For the average group though, I would advise that the leader read through all that is written before the group starts, keep the notes just to him/her and read anything to the group that did not come out after discussing a question. Other groups may want to have a copy of the study for each person. Whatever works for your group is good. All of the studies have been used by me in a Small Group setting. I try to keep the study to 75 minutes but it has been known to go overtime to 90 minutes. For some studies you may want for it to be over two sessions. I would encourage the group to start with the warm-up question, go through the study and to save worship and prayer till the end. Some groups will spend time catching up with one another before the group starts and others will want to connect more at the end.
A Few Hints for Small Group Leaders
Read over the notes beforehand. Familiarize yourself with the questions and think through your own answers. You will be modeling to the group the time taken to answer and also the level of vulnerability.
Do send out a reminder two or three days ahead of time via email. If possible, call each member the day before, you may want to let them know what you will be studying when you call. Try and think of a teaser question of what you are studying that will provoke their curiosity.
Let the people who are attending for the first time know that you have some spare bibles if they do not have one or forget theirs.
Make your house appealing to all the senses. Have some fresh coffee brewing as people arrive; there’s nothing more welcoming than that fresh coffee smell. Create an atmosphere by having a few lit candles around the room and some snacks on the table. Perhaps have some worship music playing in the background.
If the visitor knows someone in the group, make sure that person has no other job than to greet the person at the door and stay alongside the visitor during the time together. It can be scary for a visitor to come to a stranger’s house for the first time, so if at all possible, try to introduce yourself to the new person beforehand, perhaps at a coffee bar. Tell them a little bit about yourself as the leader and what the group is like; create an expectation in the person.
Begin each study with prayer. If you pray a simple prayer, it will make it easier to ask others to also pray at the beginning. It could be as simple as “Father, prepare our hearts and minds to learn more about Jesus tonight, Amen.”
Be careful that no one person dominates the discussion. Some may want to show off their knowledge by answering all the questions before others have a chance to think. Politely share with that person that you would love to hear from other members of the group, and then ask the question again, looking around at others. It can be a little scary for a new leader/facilitator to ask a question and there is no reply. Often there is an impulse to dive in and lecture on the passage, especially if you have natural gifting as a teaching.
I have learned that people retain more if they discover it themselves. Give sufficient time. Realize that this kind of group is like popcorn, it takes a while for the popcorn to get going. Your group will be much more responsive if you hold back and let them mull over the question. Ask, “What do you guys think?” or “Is there anyone else that would like to share?” Listen well as people discuss, try to be affirming as often as you can. When somebody says something that you know to be wrong, it will be less harsh if you say “That’s interesting, John, thanks for sharing that, which verse led you to that conclusion?” People hate to be told they are wrong. Let your attitude be one of welcoming people’s thoughts, this will encourage others that are a little hesitant to jump in the discussion.
Don’t get into an argument on theology. One can win an argument but lose the person. Stick to the passage being discussed, it can be easy to get sidetracked and off subject. Gently bring the group back by refocusing on the passage at hand.
Try to start the meeting off within a five minute period of the agreed time. If the meeting tends to start 15 minutes late, people will start arriving 10-15 minutes late. If the agreed time to arrive is 7pm, then at 7:05 tell them to grab a drink and let’s get going.
Start with a warm-up question; don’t feel that you have to use the one that I have added to the study. Always end at the time stipulated. This builds confidence in your leadership and gives some safety to people with child care issues. You don’t want for people to not come the next week due to getting home too late. People forget the good time they had, all they remember was the difficulty in getting up the next morning.
Allow sufficient time for prayer at the end but always be sensitive to new attendees that have never been in a group that prays before. A long prayer time is usually hard for a not yet believer, it may be easier if the leader closes with a simple prayer until the group gets to know one another better.
If the group has sufficiently bonded together, you may want to refocus on the topic by saying something like: “What difference does this topic make for us tonight? What thing do we need to ask God to do in your life as a result of what we have learned tonight? If you had one prayer to the Father, what would you pray for tonight?
Always be loving in your attitude when a person breaks down in tears. A gentle hand on the shoulder communicates acceptance and love like nothing on earth. Expect God to touch people as you pray together.